Alhamdulillah... syukur3~ syukur yang tak terhingga kerana akhirnya aku berjaya melalui minggu yg cukup2 mendera jiwa dan raga... alhamdulillah~ dari Allah jualah kekuatan yang aku peroleh~ alhamdulillah jugak sbb walaupon aku tak brape prepare utk FKT1 td (atas sbb2 kecelaruan smgt di mlm exam + tdo smpai pg), aku berpuas hati la dgn ape yg aku mampu jawab... open drug info kan... taram saje lah~ huhuhu~ cumenye yg aku regret, bnyk yg aku study awal2 tu aku tak hengat... so sad tak sempat nak ulang bace... padan muke... hahaha~
Rasa gembira, lega, puas, free, nak melompat2 n ape2 la yg seumpamanya bile keluar je dari exam hall... sampai bilik, terus aku menjerit sekuat2 hati kerana terlalu gembiranya aku akan tibanya saat ini... blum lagi final paper on 26th nnti... ntah ape gaye aku agaknye kan??? haha~ lepas solat, terus aku menggelekkan WST ke court... smpat jugak la maen kan... kene manfaatkan setiap masa yg tersisa!!!
Dan saat ni mungkin aku da bley start counting da date... owh3~ sempat melepakkan diri depan tv lepas dinner td dgn sebahagian mereka... hakikatnye, aku ingin skali menghabiskan saat2 terakhir aku disini bersama mereka sepenuhnya... sangat2 teringin... banyak plan2 yg sepatutnya dijalankan sem ni, tak dpt dilaksanakan... ntah bile kan...
Hurrmm... bile dah free & banyak mase terluang camni, banyaklah mase aku untuk fikirkan 'mase depan'... makin bersepah sepai la emosi aku kala ini... owh~ sungguh sadis... camne nak kemas barang? camne nak bawak balik barang? camne aku saat2 nak menapak meninggalkan bumi KTSN ni? meninggalkan pahit maung manis gula2 pengalaman kat sini... camne camne n camne?? owh~ *tamau nanges!!!*
Ok2... stop pasal tu sbb aku malas nak basahkan bantal dan tilam aku ni... hish! bile masuk bab mase depan ni plak... haihla~ nak kerja... camne etika kerja... camne pergaulan mase kerja... camne nak deal ngan org2 sekeliling mase kerja... camne nak jadi lebey matang la sng cite... bukannye bole nak wat perangai cam skang ni... nak gelak2 bersuka hati... gurau2 bersuka ria... camne eh?? boleh ke aku??
Bile dah kerja... hurmmm... da keje, da pegang dwet sdr... dah bayar dwet kete sdr... duit rumah bla bla bla... pastilah persoalan teman hidup plak yg takleh nak dielak... aku mmg pasti!! & mende ni mmg lumrah pon kan... standard la tu... umo pon nak masuk 23 dah (pergh!!!)... makcik pakcik saya tu nnti pastilah bertanya2 kan??? owh~ dimanakah my mr right... beliau sungguh misteri sehingga membuatkan aku tertanya2 dan ternanti2 hingga kini...
Aku rase, aku perlu clearkan everything yang mungkin tanpa aku sedar masih bersaki baki dlm hati ni... yeah~ everything... & maybe the best way is to leave this beloved place so that i can be in a new environment, new places, new people... daripada aku membenci... that's the thing... sukarnya bila hati tidak dijaga dr mula... nak merawat tidak semudah mencegah... utk melupakan mungkin bukan lagi satu masalah bagi aku... cume, oleh kerana kesannya aku dpt rasakan dan lihat, aku jadi jengkel sendiri... macam perumpamaan paku & kayu dan kertas & dakwat tu yang aku dok membebel sebelum ni... klu da tgk kertas comot2 rase nak buang je kan... & at the end, mmg buang je pon... tp bile melibatkan hati dan perasaan??? bley ke nak buang hati ganti yang baru??? i wish if i could~
Sape kate hati tak cemburu? melihat teman2 gembira dan bahagia? tp itulah bahagian mereka... bahagian aku masih belum tiba... aku menanti...
Enough la membebel hidayah... baik gi tido2 ke kan... mentang2 takde exam... well, have to make sure that i can do better in my last two papers!!! coz i want to be one of the graduates in konvokesyen 2010!!! fighting!!!
Just nak share lagu Graduation by Vitamin C ni... aku tak ingat bile 1st time aku dengar lagu ni... tp yg aku ingat, aku gune lagu ni utk projek kelas kemahiran komputer mase kat matrik dulu... hahaha~
terimalah~ (sambil menyanyi penuh perasaan)
And so we talked all night about the rest of our lives
Where we're gonna be when we turn 25
I keep thinkin' times will never change
Keep on thinking things will always be the same
But when we leave this year we won't be coming back
No more hanging out cause we're on a different track
And if you got something that you need to say
You better say it right now cause you don't have another day
Cause we're moving on and we can't slow down
These memories are playing like a film without sound
And I keep thinking of that night in June
I didn't know much of love
But it came too soon
And there was me and you
And when we got real blue
Stay at home talking on the telephone with me
We'd get so excited, we'd get so scared
Laughing at our selves thinking life's not fair
And this is how it feels
Chorus:
As we go on we remember
All the times we had together
And as our lives change come whatever
We will still be Friends Forever
So if we get the big jobs
And we make the big money
When we look back now
Will our jokes still be funny?
Will we still remember everything we learned in school?
Still be trying to break every single rule
Will little brainy Bobby be the stockbroker man?
Can Heather find a job that won't interfere with her tan
I keep, I keep thinking that it's not goodbye
Keep on thinking it's a time to fly
And this is how it feels
La, la, la, la…
Yeah, yeah, yeah
La, la, la, la…
We will still be friends forever
Will we think about tomorrow like we think about now?
Can we survive it out there?
Can we make it somehow?
I guess I thought that this would never end
And suddenly it's like we're women and men
Will the past be a shadow that will follow us 'round?
Will these memories fade when I leave this town
I keep, I keep thinking that it's not goodbye
Keep on thinking it's a time to fly
-wassalam-
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